Mr Unavailable and the Fallback Girl | Natalie Lue

Summary of: Mr Unavailable and the Fallback Girl
By: Natalie Lue

Introduction

Embark on a journey of self-discovery and relationship transformation with the book summary of ‘Mr Unavailable and the Fallback Girl’ by Natalie Lue. This enlightening guide traces the author’s personal experiences and the lessons she learned about dealing with emotionally unavailable men. Through numerous examples and cautionary tales, you will learn to recognize the signs of emotionally unavailable partners, understand how confusion and inconsistency are key tactics these men use, and identify the various ‘Fallback Girl’ behaviors individuals adopt. Gain insights on how to break free from this destructive pattern by examining your own emotional baggage, establishing your boundaries, and embracing self-love and personal growth.

Avoiding Unavailable Men

Natalie Lue’s story of finding the power to avoid unhealthy relationships by valuing herself.

After a decade of unsuccessful dating experiences, author Natalie Lue suffered a panic attack while out on a date with her married boyfriend. This situation was her wake-up call that she was settling for unavailable men, who used her as a fallback girl.

Lue’s journey towards building her self-esteem, setting strong boundaries, and learning how to communicate them, transformed her mental and physical health. She learned that she was the common denominator in her past relationships, and it was not luck that created the same pattern in her dating life.

Lue came to realize that she was addicted to the drama that came with being in unhealthy relationships and was unaware of her own self-worth. Her story emphasizes that relationships should allow you to feel supported, valued, and peace rather than add drama to your life.

By sharing her experiences, Lue has taught thousands of people how to identify when someone is emotionally unavailable and, ultimately, avoid getting into toxic relationships. Her life outcomes also show how valuing oneself can lead to fulfilling relationships.

Emotionally Unavailable Men: The Blowing Hot and Cold Cycle

Understanding the confusing behavior of emotionally unavailable men is challenging. Though they can appear intimately involved, they tend to retreat when things get too serious. The cycle of hot and cold behavior ultimately exhausts their partners, blurring their boundaries and making them doubt what they deserve. Recognizing and avoiding emotionally unavailable men is essential to pursuing passionate and stable relationships.

Beware of Fast Forwarding Men

Fast-forwarding men are emotionally unavailable partners who come on too strong and won’t stick around for the long haul. They use tactics such as future faking to distract from their commitment issues. Recognize the warning signs and get out of the relationship as soon as possible.

If you’re a fan of romantic comedies, you might be familiar with the whirlwind romance storyline. Two people meet for coffee, and before you know it, they’re dancing in golden autumn leaves and headed straight down the aisle. In the movies, this is seen as true love. However, encountering someone who comes on very strong very quickly can be a sign that you’re dealing with an emotionally unavailable partner.

Men who move too fast usually won’t stick around for the long haul. Some men will declare their love on the second date, introduce you to their mother on the third, and call it fast-forwarding. By coming on very strong very fast, that man is able to sweep you off your feet and distract you from asking too many questions about him, but he is also more likely to be a Mr. Unavailable who loves the thrill of the chase and the intensity of the early stages of a relationship. However, they are terrible at building something that lasts.

The problem is that these men often paint a rosy picture of a future they have no intention of sticking around for, a strategy called future faking. In contrast to what most people believe, men who are scared of commitment will not shy away from discussing the future. They might even talk about children on the first date or plan a business trip with you a year away. But when reality hits, and it’s time to step up and make things work, the future-faker usually vanishes. They often have a history of treating their partners exactly the way they are treating you, so it’s crucial to recognize these warning signs.

Leading people on and making promises they can’t keep is cruel and irresponsible. If you think you’re dealing with a future-faker, the only thing you need to fast forward is your exit out of the relationship. Recognize the warning signs and get out of the relationship as soon as possible to avoid being hurt.

The Trap of Mr. Unavailable

Mr. Unavailable keeps you stuck in undefined relationships, enjoying sex with no commitment and refusing to commit to anything. He wants to keep you hanging where he can reach you, and he’ll insert himself back into your life after a breakup to stroke his ego. He’ll toss you breadcrumbs of commitment and affection, but it’s not enough. You deserve the whole goddamn loaf.

Are you in a relationship with Mr. Unavailable? The man who thrives on shades of gray and ambiguity, where he never has to be accountable to you. He enjoys sex with no commitment and prefers undefined relationships, leaving you to question if you’re more than just friends with benefits. Mr. Unavailable wants to keep you stuck in this undefined space where he holds all the cards.

Having great sex might keep you going back for more, but it’s essential to ask whose terms it’s on. Unfortunately, sex complicates everything, and Mr. Unavailable likes to take advantage of that. He’s unable to commit, and even if you break up with him, he won’t let you go. He’ll insert himself back into your life, begging to be friends or stalking your Instagram profile to stroke his ego.

When confronted with his disappointing behavior, he’ll try to counter it by reminding you of that one time he did something thoughtful or gave you a rose. But breadcrumbs will never satisfy you unless you’re an ant. You deserve the whole goddamn loaf. Don’t let Mr. Unavailable keep you stuck in undefined relationships where he holds all the power.

Mr. Unavailable and his Crocodile Tears

When a man you’re dating shares an emotional story about his past, it’s easy to be moved by his tears. However, if he’s known for being emotionally unavailable, these tears may be just a tactic to avoid responsibility. These “crocodile tears” are a manipulation strategy that Mr. Unavailable often uses. By sharing his traumatic experiences, he can justify his fear of commitment and emotional vulnerability.

The problem with Mr. Unavailable is that he never takes responsibility for his actions. He’s a master of excuses and projecting his faults onto others. He may claim to be a perfectionist or have impossible standards, making it impossible for anyone to live up to his expectations. The reality is that he’s just unwilling to put in the work to be a real partner.

If you’re with Mr. Unavailable, then you’re missing out on a real partner who cares about your well-being and the health of your relationship. Don’t fall for the crocodile tears. They’re just another way for Mr. Unavailable to avoid responsibility and not invest in your relationship.

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