Sacred Marriage | Gary L. Thomas

Summary of: Sacred Marriage: What If God Designed Marriage to Make Us Holy More Than to Make Us Happy?
By: Gary L. Thomas


Embark on a transformative journey with the book summary of ‘Sacred Marriage’ by Gary L. Thomas. Rather than seeking happiness, discover how the true purpose of marriage is holiness. This summary delves into themes such as reconciliation, practicing Christian virtues, building perseverance, and the importance of righteous communication. This instructive and engaging summary will help illuminate and demystify the significance of every challenge and opportunity faced in a marital relationship, revealing the path to spiritual growth and a deeper connection with God through the sanctity of marriage.

The Spiritual Path in Marriage

Marriage is not just about achieving happiness but embracing the opportunity to undergo a personal transformation that will bring you closer to God. For Christians, the ultimate purpose of marriage is holiness. It’s important to make it your goal to please God in all areas of life, including marriage. Reconciliation is crucial, and by replacing hostility with peace and love, your marriage can withstand all kinds of lightning strikes. By confronting weakness and viewing every conflict as an opportunity for transformation, you’ll grow closer to God and ultimately, to your spouse.

The Divine Love in Marriage

In this old rabbinical story, two brothers who were wheat farmers worked together and shared their harvest equally. One night, they secretly added their grain to each other’s stores, and when they met, embraced at the realization of their love for each other. This site was proclaimed as a holy place for the temple of God. Similarly, marriage is also a holy place where spouses can practice the Christian virtues of love and respect. Loving your partner is an opportunity to reflect Christ’s love and to excel at it. Marriage also offers you the chance to experience differences, transcend the ego, and find joy in the other. Respect, on the other hand, can become harder to conjure when love goes into a predictable routine. But it’s important to cultivate gratitude actively and honor your spouse by showing appreciation through compliments or affirmations. Gaining a deeper understanding of your partner’s life can also boost empathy and make it easier to honor them. By loving and respecting your spouse, you’re effectively proclaiming your love for God.

Marriage, Humility, and Forgiveness

Marriage serves as an avenue to foster humility, confront sin and teach forgiveness.

Dating can be likened to a game as people tend to present an idealized version of themselves to be liked or loved. However, the scenario changes in marriage, where couples spend more time together and can no longer hide their flaws. Marriage reveals one’s true self, unmasking faults, weaknesses, and selfish attitudes. It is a tool for self-reflection and encourages personal growth.

The fundamental message – marriage exposes sin and teaches forgiveness. François Fénelon, an 18th-century Christian mystic, advocates for humility, which he considers as a foundation of virtue. Confronting one’s sin takes courage, but the reward is the pathway to humility. Marriage provides a platform to learn humility by asking the spouse to identify areas where they see unholiness in the other.

It is common for spouses to hurt one another, but learning to forgive is crucial. Christian marriage requires learning to love the sinner and hate the sin, which develops a bond between spouses. Conflict presents an opportunity for spiritual growth, and winning an argument should not come before the relationship’s wellbeing.

Fostering marital compromise and conflict resolution creates a bond between spouses – one that strengthens their relationship and even leads to makeup sex! Mastering conflict resolution translates to a better understanding of how to heal conflicts with God.

In conclusion, marriage is a means to confront sin and teach forgiveness, foster humility, and personal growth. Conflict challenges spouses to empty themselves and embrace each other’s pain, leading to stronger relationships and better spiritual growth.

Building perseverance and character in marriage

Marriage is not just about the good times. It’s about persevering through challenges and building character. The feeling of sameness is normal, but it’s possible to be married for decades. Marriage is an act of perseverance and mirrors the character of Jesus. With patience, time, and spiritual growth, you can consciously work towards a good marriage. Struggle can enhance your faith, so whenever you encounter trials, thank God for the chance to spiritually mature.

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