She Comes First | Ian Kerner

Summary of: She Comes First: The Thinking Man’s Guide to Pleasuring a Woman
By: Ian Kerner


Welcome to the captivating summary of ‘She Comes First: The Thinking Man’s Guide to Pleasuring a Woman’ by Ian Kerner. This informative guide shatters the myth that good sex revolves around size and thrusting power, and instead emphasizes the importance of the clitoris when it comes to female pleasure. Delve into this enlightening content as it unravels the complexity of the clitoris and provides you with all the essential knowledge required to truly satisfy your female partner. Learn about the anatomy, the different ‘hot spots,’ as well as the intricate stages of arousal, and uncover the true art of cunnilingus.

The Art of Female Orgasm

Good sex involves more than just size and thrusting power. Studies have shown that to achieve orgasm, a woman needs clitoral stimulation, which is three times more sensitive than the vaginal wall. The G-spot is actually the base of the clitoris, so G-spot climaxes are inseparable from clitoral orgasms. Penetration isn’t necessary for mutual pleasure. Cunnilingus is the best way to make a woman climax, as oral sex is a surefire way for women to reach orgasm. While using your tongue may be the best way to satisfy a woman, mastering the art of getting it right involves knowing the complexity of the clitoris. Even women with congenital vaginal agenesis can still orgasm, proving that achieving female orgasm is a journey worth taking.

The Complex Art of Clitoral Stimulation

The clitoris has over 8,000 nerve fibers, making it a highly complex part of the female body. To truly pleasure a woman, it’s essential to learn the art of clitoral stimulation, which involves understanding its various hot spots. These include the clitoral head, hidden clitoral cluster or G-spot, pubic mound, front commissure, frenulum, labia minora, vaginal entrance, fourchette, perineum, and anus. During arousal, these areas become highly sensitive and swell, contributing to the overall sexual response system of the female body. By taking the time to explore and understand these hot spots, partners can enhance sexual pleasure for women.

The Dramatic Structure of Female Arousal

Female arousal has a defined dramatic structure with a beginning, middle, and end. Act I is foreplay, where a woman’s body prepares for sexual response. Act II is coreplay, the climax buildup, and Act III is moreplay, the return to a pre-aroused state. During foreplay, a woman’s skin becomes sensitive, and certain chemicals and hormones are released. In Act II, muscle tension, breathing, heart rate, and blood pressure all increase. Finally, Act III sees a return to the pre-aroused state, with women taking longer to return to normal than men. Understanding the three stages of female arousal is essential in creating a fulfilling sexual experience.

Mastering the Art of Foreplay

The importance of building sexual tension through foreplay is explained in this book. It is recommended to delay cunnilingus and focus on stimulating other parts of the body. Massaging feet and playfully tying up your partner are enjoyable forms of erotic stimulation. When it’s finally time for cunnilingus, treat it ceremoniously and with undivided attention. The “ice cream” lick is an effective technique, but it’s essential to ensure the comfort of both partners. The recommended position is for the woman to lie on her back, allowing for comfort and eye contact. By following these guidelines, readers can master the art of foreplay and proceed to coreplay with confidence.

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